From: http://psyed.org/r/cog/bw/bwd/manip.html
Covert-Aggressive Personalities
Personality can be defined by the way a person habitually perceives, relates to and interacts with others and the world at large. The tactics of deceit, manipulation and control are a steady diet for covert-aggressive personality. It’s the way they prefer to deal with others and to get the things they want in life.The Process of Victimization
Manipulation victims get hoodwinked for some very good reasons:– A manipulator’s aggression is not obvious and we can’t point to clear, objective evidence they’re aggressing against us.
– Manipulators make it seem they’re hurting, caring, defending, … almost anything but fighting. These tactics are hard to recognize as merely clever ploys. They always make just enough sense to make a person doubt their they’re being taken abused.
– A clever manipulator exploits sensitivities. Manipulators may know us better than we know ourselves and know what buttons to push, when and how hard.
– A manipulator challenges everything we believe about human nature. What’s more, most of us generally hate to think of ourselves as callous and insensitive people. We hesitate to make harsh or seemingly negative judgments about others. We want to give them the benefit of the doubt and assume they have don’t really harbor the malevolent intentions we suspect.
This article helped me so much to understand how Hyde was able to abuse me for so long without me recognizing it. Read the whole article here: http://psyed.org/r/cog/bw/bwd/manip.html